i became suicidal at 9 years old

"when you look in the mirror, what do you see?"
the woman asked me. i was 9. i did not understand.
"i see me." i replied.
she chuckled.
"i mean, if you just met the person you see in the mirror,
what would you see?"
i looked closer (she made me feel obligated) and
i did not see anything, even as my nose touched the cool surface of the mirror,
2 dark brown eyes staring back at me,
unforgiving infernos.

"i do not see anything" i said in a kind of despair.
the woman behind me patted my shoulder, a patronizing smile on her glossed lips.

"it's okay, hon.

it's okay."